Reservations

I'm scared. I mean I'm really excited and getting emails from the family that are supportive and helpful on a regular basis really helps. But it's the first time I'm going somewhere without a real base support. In college there were thousands of freshman who were just as excited and ready to meet new people as I was. My sister went abroad with people she didn't know, but they were all American and there were people there to help her. I think that this is the greatest challenge and the best challenge I face going to be an au pair. I think it is one of the forces that keeps me going, to prove that I can really be on my own and make new friends and have a life. It's also one of the things that keeps me up at night.

I'm not sure why I'm writing this other than I think it helps quell my fears knowing that other people know them before I'm there and really panicking. I know that no one can really stop them now or ever, but it does make it better just putting it out there.